Talk to your children
The international Pro-Life flag is pictured.
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August 9, 2025
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Every time there is an election, courageous voices rise up. These voices seek to defend life from conception to natural death and call on governments to limit access to abortion.
Every time there are criminal trials alleging sexual assault, the prosecution seeks to present evidence proving beyond a reasonable doubt that the accused person(s) did not obtain consent from the alleged victim(s).
The criminal trial scenario focuses on the circumstances around the initial sexual act: the pro-lifer scenario focuses on the result.
As noble an endeavour as pro-lifers engage in by raising their voices to address the result of sexual activity, such voices might find success in preventing some of the demand for abortions in the first place by speaking about a topic common to both scenarios: consent.
In the recent criminal trial in London, Ontario in which five members of Canada’s 2018 National Junior Hockey Team were accused of sexual assault, the prosecution failed to prove that there was lack of consent on the part of the alleged victim. The accused parties had no legal obligation to prove consent.
The Criminal Code of Canada provides a number of factors to consider in assessing whether consent is obtained. Consent, for example, is not valid when expressed by a person other than the complainant; when the complainant is unconscious or incapable of consenting for any other reason, and so on.
Whether those outside the courthouse believe the five accused engaged in a criminal act or not, a valid question arises around whether it is reasonable to say that the alleged victim could have truly consented in a situation where there was such a great power imbalance. The alleged victim was naked and in some state of intoxication, surrounded by five exceptionally strong elite athletes. On the other hand, it is possible that valid consent was expressed. Regardless of the legal arguments and outcome, isn’t there an opportunity here for pro-lifers to step up to the plate and help prevent such scenarios in the first place?
Do Catholic parents take it upon themselves or do they rely on schools or their children’s friends to teach them how to act responsibly in a dating situation?
Although I grew up in a non-practising Lutheran family, I knew enough about Catholic teaching to be shocked when I learned that a young Catholic man told his teenage girlfriend: “If I get you pregnant, I’ll pay for half the abortion.” Similarly, a young Catholic woman counseled a friend: “Wait for a month before having sex with your boyfriend.” I didn’t see any connection between what the Catholic Church taught and the lived experience of my young Catholic friends.
If Catholic parents don’t feel comfortable broaching the topic with their children, do they find out exactly what is being taught in their schools?
Even if there is a fairly good introduction to topics such as consent provided by your school system, will any academic training result in strong, confident children, fully able to handle any situation that develops when dating? Will a petite woman dating a significantly larger man with an aggressive, domineering personality be able to say ‘no’ safely?
Returning now to the obligation of governments to protect young persons, is there not more work to be done regarding the definition of ‘consent’ with regard to sexual activity?
In Canada, the legal age of consent is 16. Is age alone enough to prove the ability to assert oneself in dating relationships? The Youth Criminal Justice Act deals with offenders between the ages of 12 and 17 who are treated more gently as there is a belief that persons of that age are not fully capable of making good choices about their actions, yet the law permits consent to highly complex sexual relationships as early as at age 16. Various studies assert that brains aren’t fully developed until persons reach their mid-twenties, and even more refinement takes place in their thirties.
Whether you are a hockey parent or not, if you are truly pro-life, don’t miss out on the opportunity to prevent unwanted pregnancies. Talk to your children, to your school administrators and politicians to ensure that every new life is welcomed into its parents’ loving embrace.
A version of this story appeared in the August 10, 2025, issue of The Catholic Register with the headline "Pro-lifers must teach what consent truly means".
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